For the past year, I've had a beautiful therapeutic studio sitting empty. A clinic, some call it. And despite having clients reach out, despite knowing I could help, I've kept the doors closed. Why?
The answer takes us back to 11/11/11 – the day I quit my tech career to become "a healer of sorts." But this isn't just about that decision. It's about what happened after, and more importantly, what's happening now.
The Promise I Couldn't Keep
When I first stepped into facilitation work with sacred medicines, I made a promise to the divine: "Grant me two years to work with these substances, and then I'll transition to doing this work without them." I knew, even then, that these medicines could become another mask for me. Growing up around both spirituality and substance abuse, I recognized the seductive pull of hiding behind external tools – even sacred ones.
But two years came and went. My practice grew. People kept coming. Groups kept expanding. The more I tried to step away, the more the work seemed to find me. Classic spiritual bypass, wrapped in good intentions and positive results.
The Seven-Year Surrender
Seven years ago, I finally raised the white flag. I went back to Israel, planning to take a year or two for inner work. Those two years turned into seven – my own "dark night of the soul." Even when financial pressure pushed me back to tech for a while, my heart wasn't in it. I knew I was in a chrysalis, transforming into something I couldn't yet see.
The Last Holdout
Recently, I created the 42 framework, a guide for healing through storytelling. I thought I was finally ready to share my gifts. But I quickly realized – this framework was just another sophisticated hiding place. A beautiful one, yes, but still a mask.
The only thing standing between me and a thriving practice isn't lack of experience or tools. It's not about methodology or frameworks. It's about facing the core fear I was born with, the lie I learned in childhood: that I'm not safe in my truth.
The Ultimate Irony
Here's the cosmic joke: my truth isn't just safe – it's my medicine. The very thing I've been afraid to share is exactly what I'm here to offer.
When I'm clear and in my heart, something profound comes through me. Call it channeling, call it guidance, call it whatever you want. For years, I wouldn't use words like these because they felt too precious, too woo-woo. Now I understand why some choose these terms – because what comes through when we're truly surrendered is bigger than our personal story, bigger than our carefully constructed identity.
The Time Is Now
So here I am, taking off the last mask. No more hiding behind substances, frameworks, or methodologies. Just me, my truth, and a deep commitment to walking beside you on your journey of remembering.
Whether you're:
Navigating emotional turmoil
Seeking purpose
Processing psychedelic experiences
Dealing with relationship challenges
Or simply trying to make sense of life's changes
I'm here. Not as someone who has it all figured out, but as someone who's intimate with the journey from external seeking to inner remembering.
The Real Journey Home
This is why I've reframed the traditional Hero's Journey into what I call the Healer's Journey. The key difference? The "happily ever after" – the resolution – happens entirely within. The only way out is in.
Ready to begin?
With open heart and naked truth, Oriya
P.S. This is the first in a series of daily shares. If this resonates, subscribe to join me on this journey of radical authenticity.
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